Silencing the “Not Good Enough”

The most frightening moment of my week usually involves the space right before I press the “publish” key on Wonder & Awe. During this time, a series of thoughts run through my mind…  

“You probably should not have said that because it is a little too vulnerable and do people really need to know that?”

“There are million people who take better pictures than you; do you really think people want to see these?”

“You barely have it together, why should you try and share any sort of insight?”

“Other girls are way more stylish than you, what makes you think that you have something to share?”

These thoughts can scream in the back of my head, until it is almost impossible to press the “publish” key. This space is filled with doubt, comparison and self-condemnation.  It is totally ugly and life sucking. 

The thoughts generally boil down to a common theme – “Who do you think that you are? Everyone else does it better.”

If it was not for a few extremely supportive loved ones in my life, these voices would have dominated my thoughts, and, simply put, Wonder & Awe never would have happened. Around the time that I was toying with the idea of starting this space, I watched Brene Brown’s TED talk about the power of vulnerability. Brene Brown’s research revealed that all of human connection lies in allowing ourselves to show up and be seen as who we really are. She talks about the power of creating art that is uniquely “you” and the courage that it requires. I had been hiding my creative outlets in fear that I was just not good enough. But then in that moment it all then became very clear. I could show up and allow myself and my passions to be seen or I could hide parts of myself out of fear of the critic. I had a choice. 

I could choose to be brave.

Often, the voices are particularly scary because there is some truth to them. There are a million more talented photographers out there, thousands of more stylish girls and others much more seasoned and wise than myself. I have a lot left to learn. But I am here. I took the step. I started. And now I am in the arena learning.

Since beginning, I have learned that others most appreciate the posts that I am most scared to share. 

There is tremendous power in allowing ourselves to be seen and speaking about the topics closest to our heart. It creates a space where you can say, “You too? I thought I was the only one.”

I love this space. Wonder & Awe has become part of me because my heart is here. The whole process is terrifying and completely exhilarating but there is never a moment where I regretted having begun. There is no end goal here. The pure enjoyment of the work itself is everything.

So, please if you have a part of your heart that you want to share, art you feel compelled to create, stories to tell, recipes to bake, rooms to design, please be brave and begin. 

We need to encourage each other to be brave and share our creativity or else the voices will win. 

You will never feel ready or good enough.  But you are so perfectly you, and that is certainly good enough.